Monday, December 03, 2007


In the true Laura Skowronski style, another small story has reached epic proportions.

Over a month ago, now, we had discovered a lizard in our apartment that scampered off into the kitchen and took shelter underneath our dishwasher. For weeks I was obsessing with setting up boxes with spinach leaves and bottlecaps of water, trying anything to coax it out safely. I saw it usually once or twice per day when things were quiet (either in the morning or after Naveen had left for class). I almost managed to catch it once (see past posts 1 and 2), but failed and felt horrible about it, especially since I wasn't sure if I had hurt its tail. I stopped seeing it for weeks, and by Thanksgiving I had (almost jokingly) spoken a little lizard eulogy while putting dishes away. Surely it was dead by now, or managed to find a crack in the foundation, or something.

This morning (December 3) I woke up and was walking toward my desk to check mail before eating breakfast (because that's the kind of nerd that I am). As I wheeled out my desk chair - I saw a quick little flash and immediately knew it was my lizard. Naveen was just waking up too and was coming out of his bedroom when I told him to go back and give me 5 minutes - so he did. I barracaded the hall with a floor-length mirror, blocked off the kitchen with some boxes, and set up a clear path to the open porch door. Quite the obstacle course - and not the easiest thing to manage when you have a screwed up knee. Still, I was able to see the tiny lizard in the back-right corner under my desk. I had the poor thing cornered. I piled up a stack of printer paper in front of it, and reached behind the stack to grab the lizard - but she quickly scurried in a tiny little space left between the paper packages and my desk. So instead I laid a cardboard box on its side at the back wall, and I slowly pulled the paper stack away from the desk. The lizard was riding slowly on one of the packages as I was moving it. It looked pretty confused that I could change the world's geography with a slight of hand.

Now it only had two ways to go - either toward me and my scary self, or toward the box at the back wall. So it hopped back into safety, not realizing that it was standing on the inside of a box. I laid down on the floor and quickly folded up the box flaps to trap it. I could hear it scurrying around inside - but meanwhile I was ecstatic - I got it! I finally got it!

I took it outside onto the porch. Even then, it didn't leave the box just yet - it looked stunned that it was back outside after almost two months. It gave me a minute to take this quick snapshot (above) - which also shows how small this thing was - it's in a Hefty Cinch Sak box, and as I labeled, the side is about 4 inches, which is about the length of the lizard from nose to tip of the tail.

Let me just say, I know what you're thinking. And yes, I'm crazy. But I got a huge thrill out of saving this one tiny lizard, and I'll definitely remember that.

The End


Joanna said...

Wow... for some reason I thought that was going to end with it getting run over my a car or consumed by a bird or something. I'm glad you finally got that little guy though! Congrats!

Laura "Sko" said...

Hahahah. Trust me, you are not the only person who thought that! It would have definitely been sad and ironic if that had happened.

Maybe the thinking is in part because people know I'm making the Misfit Magician short film - and there's no glorious comeback or justification - no good karma for the clownish trickster. Alas - the lizard is far luckier in the end of this story.

I told another friend of mine that immediately after setting the lizard free - I began thinking about what ELSE I should have done... "I wonder if I should have let it go in the grass in the front yard because maybe that's where it came from... but if I did that, maybe it would have been stepped on or run over... so maybe I should have let it go in a field nearby.. only then maybe it would be completely lost and far from home.. so maybe I should have..."

Yeah so I think I'm just going to happily bask in my sense of accomplishment (and luck). For now, I also have to get back to sawwing my assistant lady in half (I'll post a new video clip very soon). This is my senseless gag piece - no real moral to the story. Next up will be something a bit more purposeful. ;)